Lindsay Lohan Exposed!

These pictures from Muse Magazine, whatever that is, claim to be of Lindsay Lohan exposed. Unfortunately for us the only thing exposed is that dude’s bare ass in the second pic, which is completely uncalled for if you ask me. Luckily there are a couple of decent shots of Lindsay’s ass and cleavage, so it wasn’t a complete waste of my time. We all know what Lindsay’s junk looks like anyway so It’s nothing new.

Once Again, Jessica Simpson Disappoints

I’m getting a little pissed off at Jessica Simpson lately. Every time we see her now she’s covered up like an old rich lady. We all know she gained a couple of inches around her waist, hips and course those delicious chesticles. So before she goes back to the gym and works off her insecurities, she needs to let me enjoy my favorite set in Hollywood while they’re at their biggest. Consider it an early Christmas present for me…

Mariah Carey’s Fat Cleavage For Unicef

Here’s Mariah Carey at The 2009 Unicef Snowflake Ball. Knowing that Unicef is all about world hunger, I’m pretty sure Mariah and her fat boobies could feed a small 3rd world country. Not sure if silicon is toxic or not but if you’re starving I guess you’ve got to make do with what you get.

Jessica Simpson Disappoints

How could anyone not be disappointed with the pictures of Jessica Simpson out in NYC last night? She looks absolutely huge. Maybe it’s the camera angle, maybe it’s the outfit she happens to be wearing or maybe it’s the massive amounts of corn dogs and cheese doodles she’s been eating at all the f@#king country fairs she sang at this summer. Her agent needs to book her some “gigs” at a few fat farms or Jenny Craig conventions because this is getting out of hand. The button on her jacket looks like it’s holding on for dear life. Hang in there little guy.

avril Lavigne Does Something Other Than Annoy Me

It looks like Avril Lavigne is finally doing something other than being a washed up, divorced former teenage candy/punk rocker. Here she is filming some sort of commercial the other day. Good for her. Oh wait, it’s a Canadian commercial. Never mind. At least she didn’t go and do something stupid like ruin her body by having a baby. I just wish she’d grow out of this fake punk stage, she’s what thirty? Time to break out the slutty outfits, she’s a divorcee. Hot!

Heather Graham Because She Is Hot

Here’s Heather Graham leaving MTV studios. I don’t know what she’s promoting other than pure cougar hotness. I’m not sure if Heather is old enough to be considered a cougar, but that’s the angle I’m going with for this post, otherwise I got nothing … Except for the tightness forming in my pants, but you don’t want to know about that.

Miranda Kerr Ruins A See Through Moment

I always thought that supermodels were supposed to be free wheeling anything goes show your boobs at dinner parties kind of girls. Apparently I was wrong. Here’s Miranda Kerr covering up her chest plums on her way to something that none of us care about. Of all the people out there who I think would be comfortable not wearing a bra under a see through tank top, Miranda would be at the top of my list. Just ahead of Pamela Anderson and Perez Hilton.