CELEBRITY SEXY PICTURE

Miranda Kerr’s Cleavage Is Red Hot

2010-03-26T06:29:00.000-07:00

This job can mess up your perception of things sometimes so on occasion I like to find some pictures of supermodels like Miranda Kerr just walking around, you know, just to see if they look like they would blend in to everyday society…. They don’t. They’re frickin’ awesome and they know it. I bet this chick has never paid for a drink or had a parking ticket before in her life. God bless her. In my next life I would like to be a supermodels assistant. Even in the after life I have low expectations.

Jennifer Love Hewitt’s Little Cleavage Comes Out

2010-03-26T06:25:00.000-07:00

Alright so these pictures of Jennifer Love Hewitt out promoting a book she wrote are a little better than yesterday’s where she was dressed as an out of work figure skater. Why anyone needs to read a book from this broad is beyond me, but at least she’s giving a little peek at her cleavage. They’re only a little better because I always understood that newly single chicks were supposed to dress in slutty little revealing outfits, get drunk and make out with strangers behind the DJ booth. Apparently I’m wrong.

Britney Spears And Her Puffy Pantaloons

2010-03-20T18:09:00.001-07:00

I don’t know what the hell is going on with Britney Spears these days, and quite frankly I couldn’t give a fart in the wind, but when her craziness starts affecting the way she dresses, someone has to step in. It might as well be me. Here she is doing a little shopping in what seems to be some sort of designer adult diaper and a wife beater. I can deal with the tank top, because I like free flowing boobies, but the puffy pirate pantaloons and pantyhose have got to go. I thought her family hired someone to look after this crap.

Kristen Stewart’s First Attempt At Cleavage

2010-03-20T18:04:00.000-07:00

In the majority of the pictures I’ve ever seen of Kristen Stewart she looks like a pissed off brooding teenager who’s father just told her that her best friend in the world and softball teammate who’s family is moving to Wyoming can’t live with them until graduation. So it’s nice to see that she at least tried to sex it up a little at the premiere of her new movie The Runaways. She still looks pissed off, but that could just be because she’s a movie star, adored by millions and making a dumpload of cash. Cheer up princess.

Holly Madison’s Boobs For St Patricks’ Day

2010-03-18T19:55:00.000-07:00

I hope that all of you had a good and safe St Patrick’s day yesterday, obviously by safe I mean drunk, I know I did. Waking up with four leaf clover stickers on my ass was a little disconcerting, but I’ll get over it. Anyhow, It’s just not the day after St Patrick’s day without a big boobed Playboy Playmate like Holly Madison playing beer pong with a midget. I’m speechless. Not because Holly’s boobs are absolutely gorgeous, but because midgets frighten me. I think they can see my soul and they don’t like what they see.

The New Heidi Montag Continues To Impress

2010-03-18T19:46:00.000-07:00

I’m trying very hard, but Heidi Montag’s new boobs, face, legs, stomach and all the rest of her are hard for me to ignore. As much as she annoys the hell out of me, I still think the new Heidi is hot. I’m a shallow shallow man and I know it. Here she is walking the streets in her tiny little skirt trying her best not to draw attention to her big fake breasts. It’s not working. I would do things to this woman that even I’m embarrassed to admit.

more pictures of Heidi Montag here

Paris Hilton Swimsuit Pictures

2010-02-15T19:26:00.000-08:00

Apparently Paris Hilton is in Rio de Janeiro doing lame promotional work for some sort of Brazilian beer that nobody has ever heard of or cares about. At least while she was there she decided to walk out onto her hotel room balcony for some sun in a little black bathing suit. I especially like that she’s pretending to drink the beer, what a great actress. She’s probably got cases of it stacked up in her room. Anyhow, you know the drill, Paris Hilton, bathing suit, boobies… Etc.

Heidi Montag: Future Porn Star?

2010-02-15T19:23:00.000-08:00

After he convinced her get some bigger tits and a new face, I knew it was only a matter of time before Spencer McDouche would be pimping out his wife Heidi Montag for bachelor parties and holidays. Here she is dressed as a pornstar in a suite in Las Vegas, decorated by Fredrick’s of Hollywood, to celebrate Valentine’s Day. I wonder how long the line up of Asian business men is outside her door? Is there anything that’s not a photo-op for these two morons? In ten years when they’re nobodies again we’ll have pictures of Heidi Montag changing her tampon in a bathroom furnished by the good people at

Jessica Alba Is The Perfect Role Model

2010-02-12T17:42:00.000-08:00

I know this Valentine’s Day garbage is going to be absolutely terrible, make a shitload of money, and somehow make women everywhere wish their boyfriends or husbands were more like some douche character in the movie. Well guess what, we all wish that you were more like Jessica Alba, not because we think she’s romantic or a good person, simply because she’s hot as f@#k and would like to do it to her in the shower when you’re not looking. Deal with it.

Emma Roberts Will You Be My Valentine?

2010-02-12T17:38:00.000-08:00

Hopefully this will be the last post I do this week that has anything to do with Valentine’s Day the movie or the actual day. That being said, I wish cutie Emma Roberts was my valentine. Wouldn’t that be fun? We could spend the day in my jacuzzi tub drinking beers and telling each other how lucky I am to have her. I’ll even float some rose petals in the water to make it more romantic and to camouflage my massive boner. Obviously not real rose petals because I’m allergic and they’ll probably stain the tub, but it should have the same effect. Call me.

Alicia Keys Bikini Pictures

2010-02-10T08:58:00.000-08:00

This is one of my favorite times of the year, the holidays have been over for a little while and hot celebrity chicks want to head somewhere warm and hang out in their bikinis. Here’s Alicia Keys showing off her curves in the sun the other day. I always thought she had a bigger ass than this. Maybe the camera angle is throwing me off, whatever it is, I kinda like it. Keep up the good work.

Jennifer Aniston Bikini Pictures

2010-02-10T08:54:00.000-08:00

So Jennifer Aniston is still in Mexico celebrating her 41st birthday by hanging out in her bikini with friends. I for one am not complaining, I happen to like cougars in bikinis getting out of swimming pools, so she could spend the whole year there for all I care. I cropped out most of her friends because, well, they weren’t wearing bikinis. Oh, and of course Gerard Butler flew in to tap that sweet birthday bikini ass. If she likes foreigners with shitty accents, I’m Canadian which is close enough, maybe we can take a jacuzzi some time. Call me.

Rihanna Grabs Herself

2010-02-05T09:35:00.000-08:00

I’m kinda disappointed in these pictures of Rihanna rehearsing in her dumpy outfit, at least I hope she’s rehearsing because if she isn’t she’s really mailing this one in. We hardly ever see her in her raggedy old clothing, she’s always wearing some sort of sexy futuristic dominatrix sh%t that both delights and confuses my genitals. And another thing, I know she’s trying to be edgy and dangerous, but in my experience when woman grabs her vagina in public it’s normally not a good sign.

Vanessa Hudgens Gets A Flat

2010-02-05T09:32:00.000-08:00

Here’s Vanessa Hudgens looking sexy, sad and confused after her fancy car got a flat tire the other day. I bet she’s staring into that trunk thinking “I know Zac told me there was a spare tire in here somewhere but I just don’t see it”. Poor princess, that’s what mobile phones are for. I bet being a tow truck driver in and around Hollywood gets you a lot of tail. Maybe I’ll start my own mobile auto repair company for women only. I’ll drive around changing tires, explaining how to use the multi CD player and what exactly Bluetooth is. I’ll also bring a little asian woman with me so they can have their nails done while they wait. I think it’s got potential.

Reese Witherspoon Pumps It

2010-02-03T18:21:00.000-08:00

has always been a little too wholesome for my taste, she needs to sex it up a bit. Here she is pumping the rear end of her big black…. Ugh, I can’t even make this sh%t sound dirty, she’s too good. She’s putting gas in her car! That’s it. Deal with it. She’s probably one her way to a church picnic with her kids or to read to blind old people. Hot!

Pamela Anderson Busts Out The Old Lady Funbags

2010-02-03T18:19:00.000-08:00

I’m not posting these pictures of Pamela Anderson on her way to some party because I think she deserves to be on the site, I’m posting them purely for the big fat boobies. I’m sure most of you can appreciate where I’m coming from. They’re quite mesmerizing, I think they could probably get me to do pretty much anything right now… Except save Pamela’s career.

Sarah Harding Swimsuit Pictures

2010-02-02T18:38:00.000-08:00

Earlier today I had pictures of Girls Aloud hottie Sarah Harding almost flashing her junk getting out of a car in a little skirt. I felt bad that I couldn’t deliver the goods so here are a few shots of her playing in the ocean in her sexy one piece swimsuit. It’s a little weird to say that a one piece can be hot, but I actually really like it. Especially the way it rides up in the front like a reverse wedgie. Hot! I like to spend my summer weekends at the water park sitting at the bottom of the steepest water slide with a few beers and a camera hidden in my trucker cap. Good wholesome fun.

Amanda Seyfried’s Breasts Are Worth Watching

2010-02-02T18:34:00.000-08:00

Here’s Amanda Seyfried at the premiere of the movie Dear John last night. I have no idea what this movie is all about, but I hope it’s a big screen adaptation of the classic Judd Hirsch TV show of the same name. Anyhow, Amanda is showing off some nice cleavage so I had to post her. This girl needs to get a little more attention, she seems ’smart’ and ‘talented’. I think a movie about two promiscuous lesbian serial killers with Blake Lively is in order.

Fergie’s Impressive Lady Lumps

2010-02-01T18:15:00.000-08:00

For an older woman Fergie’s still got herself a tight body and an impressive set of lady lumps. Here she is on the red carpet at the Grammy’s looking pretty f@#king stylish, unfortunately later she transforms into some sort of transsexual dominatrix with an attitude problem. Luckily for us her boobs managed to grow quite nicely in the transformation and she/he has got some very impressive cleavage. Enjoy.

Katy Perry’s Breasts Are Grammy Winners

2010-02-01T18:12:00.000-08:00

It’s no secret that Katy Perry is one of the most annoying hipster dufus chicks around, but she’s definitely got herself some sweet front meat which is the only reason I keep putting her up on the site. If anything were to happen to those puppies she’d virtually disappear forever. Here she is they are looking plump and delicious, at some post Grammy party, stuffed nicely into a silver dress like two delicious baked potatoes ready to be buttered up and stuffed in your mouth. Now I’m just hungry.

Christina Hendricks’ Breasts Don’t “Sag” Yet

2010-01-25T20:57:00.000-08:00

Here’s Christina Hendricks at the 16th Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards held over the weekend. I like this chick and I’m glad she won a SAG Award, she deserves it. Unfortunately for us the only thing going to be sagging in the next few years are those massive boobies of hers. Gravity is a bitch.

Lindsay Lohan Personal Candids?

2010-01-25T20:54:00.000-08:00

I don’t really know what’s going on in these candid or fake candid pictures of Lindsay Lohan in the changing room, but I’m glad they came across my desk this morning. A hot chick trying on different outfits in a sexy see through unitard? Throw in some gin & tonics and this look like a fun way to spend an afternoon, I just wish she wasn’t hiding the front meat so much.

Adrianne Palicki’s Breasts Are Nicely Pushed Up

2010-01-23T23:49:00.000-08:00

I have no idea who the hell this Adrianne Palicki lady is, but she’s at the premiere of Legion and she’s stuffing her little boobs nicely into that tight dress so it doesn’t really matter. Unfortunately her face can make some pretty strange looks so I don’t think we’ll be seeing much more of her on the site, unless she keeps showing up with her boobies so handsomely pushed up. This will be a good test to see just how much this nobody wants to get noticed. I’ll keep you posted.

Kristin Cavallari’s Sexy Faces

2010-01-23T23:43:00.000-08:00

Here’s Kristin Cavallari making sexy faces as she runs through the California rain. I’d kinda like to see video of this, in slow motion, with her big blond hair bouncing around. It’s hot for some reason. Her life is pretty staged, so if they could redo this scene with her wearing a white t-shirt and maybe Ice-T’s wife CoCo working a jackhammer in the background, I’d really appreciate it. Thanks.

Jessica Simpson See Through Pictures Could Be Better

2010-01-21T19:04:00.000-08:00

After coming back so strongly with her absolutely massive cleavage, I thought Jessica Simpson was back in the game, so I’m very disappointed with these see through top pictures at the Los Angeles premiere of Extraordinary Measures. If I was her fashion advisor I’d have her lose the turtleneck altogether. If anyone can pull off the blazer and bra look it’s Jessica Simpson. I think she should at least give it a try and email me some pictures. Please. Just one.

Hilary Duff’s Booty Isn’t Enough

2010-01-21T19:02:00.000-08:00

It seems that Hilary Duff has been struggling with her hotness as of late. Don’t get me wrong, she’s still as cute as a puppy in a rollerskate, but cute isn’t going to pay the bills. And I don’t mean Hilary’s bills, I mean mine. I used to get a shitload of traffic looking for sexy Hilary Duff bikini pictures or Hilary Duff in a tight dress pictures. Nobody is coming to this site to see her in a expertly knit sweater and a pair of rain boots. At least what I can see of her ass still looks good.

Whitney Port Bikini Pictures

2010-01-19T07:16:00.001-08:00

I have to say that these pictures of Whitney Port in her bikini are pretty damn impressive. I don’t think she was this skinny in her last set of bikini pictures, I’m proud of her, we can all stand to skip a meal once and a while. Unfortunately, the “soft spots” I used to like seem to have also shrunken a little, which is somewhat disappointing. If only there were some way to rectify the situation, perhaps surgically.

Christina Aguilera’s Sweet Sparkling Cleavage

2010-01-19T07:10:00.000-08:00

It would have been nice to have pictures of Christina Aguilera with her boob hanging out of her dress at last nights Golden Globes, but that’s clearly not going to happen. Instead I’ve got some good cleavage shots of her in a dress that gives us the “illusion” of a boob slip, which is nice, but not quite the same as the real thing. At least paint a nipple on it or something.

Lindsay Lohan’s Pointer Sisters Get Some Air

2010-01-14T19:10:00.000-08:00

If you’re anything like me, then you like a few good Lindsay Lohan nipple shots (that would make a good drink). Here she is at some event letting the Pointer Sisters get some air in a nice, breezy see through top. I love a girl who’s not afraid to go braless, practically shirtless, to an event where she knows there will be lots of photographers. This is the kinda girl that will let you post naked pictures of her on the internet. It’s also the kinda girl that may give you some sort of strange rash in unmentionable areas. Enjoy.

Jessica Simpson’s Breasts Are Back In Full Force

2010-01-14T19:06:00.000-08:00

For the most part Jessica Simpson’s fluctuating weight gain/loss has been really tough on me, it’s hard to watch someone you care about let themselves go like that, I don’t know whether to give her sexy eyeballs or roll her back into the ocean. However, on this occasion I abso-f@#king love it. She must have started at the bottom and slowly squeezed her body into the tightest pair of spanks on the market for all that fatty goodness to be spilling out like this. I’m pretty sure that if any men planning terrorist attacks on America saw these boobs in real life, they would abort their plans immediately…. Or they should be renamed Al-Gayda. Enjoy.

Kristin Cavallari Wears Short Shorts

2010-01-14T05:30:00.000-08:00

After being initially disappointed that Kristin Cavallari didn’t get breast implants for her 23rd birthday, I’m kinda glad she didn’t. Here she is looking perfectly proportioned in a sweet pair of denim short shorts. I think that implants might actually throw the whole package off a little. What the f@#k am I talking about? A set of big, fat, delicious fake boobs work wonders on pretty much anybody. Next year.

Christina Aguilera Shows Her Ass-ets

2010-01-14T05:25:00.000-08:00

It seems like we’ll be getting a lot of Christina Aguilera pictures in the near future due to the fact she is filming the new movie Burlesque. I just hope that there are some stripping scenes in this film otherwise what the hell is Christina Aguilera doing in a movie in the first place? Anyway, could this possibly be the greatest Christina Aguilera shot ever?

Mila Kunis Is Still Super Cute

2010-01-12T20:55:00.000-08:00

It’s nice to see that Mila Kunis is at least trying to get back on the sexy train, here she is at the premiere of ‘The Book Of Eli’ last night in her sexy black dress. The girl is hot, but I really think she needs to dump the Home Alone kid and shack up with a nice celebrity blogger if she wants to get back in the spotlight. The internet is the future and I’m right on the front lines. Think of all the exposure she would get, she’d be on the site almost everyday. I’d be taking pictures of her doing dishes, showering, doing yoga and playing in the sprinkler in my mom’s backyard. It’s a win win situation.

Christina Aguilera’s Camel Toe Stars In Burlesque

2010-01-12T20:53:00.000-08:00

It seems that Christina Aguilera has been hard at working filming what’s sure to be an absolutely awful movie in Los Angeles over the last week or so. Here she is on the set in a nice tight pair of leggings looking a little restricted. It’s hard to say whose going to get top billing on this one, Christina or her massive camel toe. I guess we’ll just have to wait and see. I know who my vote is for.

Hollywood Tuna’s Top Ten Babes Of 2009 – #5 Rihanna

2010-01-12T07:57:00.000-08:00

It wouldn’t be a top ten list if I didn’t put Rihanna on it because this year Rihanna has been flaunting her titties every chance she gets. I guess that’s payback towards her douchebag ex-boyfriend Chris Brown for assaulting her. Way to show him Rihanna. Let him know what he’s missing. And Thank you.

Ashley Greene Skinny Jeans Ass Flash

2010-01-12T07:54:00.000-08:00

Lately I’ve been finding myself strangely attracted to this Ashley Greene chick, she really helps me fill out my pants, so that’s probably why I’m posting pictures of her doing nothing. I don’t have anything else to say really, I’m just continuing to type to keep my hands occupied because “self abuse” to pictures of a chick talking on the phone makes you some kind of maniac. Anyhow, her ass looks good in those skinny jeans. Enjoy.

Demi Lovato Is Stuffed

2010-01-10T17:37:00.001-08:00

I think this is the first time I’ve written anything about Demi Lovato, I have absolutely no clue who she is, I don’t feel like taking the three seconds to look her up and I’m alright with that. Whoever she is, she sure managed to stuff her boobies nicely into her dress last night at the People’s Choice Awards so that’s good enough for me. Is she even old enough for me to make jokes like this? I can’t tell anymore.

Victoria Silvstedt Bikini Picture

2010-01-10T17:33:00.000-08:00

I love big fake boobies as much as the next guy, but sometimes they just don’t look right. Here’s Victoria Silvstedt giving us a good look at the strange ripple effect that fake boobs can sometimes have, it looks weird, but not weird enough to stop me from wanting to motorboat those big things. Thankfully she makes up for it with some awesome shots of her tight little ass. Which coincidentally I would also like to motorboat. Enjoy.

Ashley Greene Nude Bodypaint

2010-01-09T19:05:00.000-08:00

Ashley Greene is new on the Hollywoodtuna scene so I’m happy to see that she’s doing her damnedest to get my attention. Here she is wearing nothing but a painted on bikini for some SoBe ad or Sports Illustrated bullsh#t, it doesn’t matter, she’s naked! I would love to be the gay guy that got to paint this on…. A straight guys work wouldn’t have such clean lines. Lucky gay bastard!

Jessica Simpson’s Cleavage Unleashed!

2010-01-09T19:02:00.000-08:00

Finally Jessica Simpson gives us something worthwhile to stare at. Here she is, still wearing far too much closing, but giving us a nice little peek at her sweet cleavage. It’s really not much, but after being deprived of it for so long it’s a good start. She seems to be spending far too much time in the cold climate, I think it’s time for a sunny vacation. May I suggest somewhere with a clothing optional beach? Think about it and let me know.

Hilary Duff Disappoints

2010-01-07T18:31:00.000-08:00

There is absolutely nothing exciting with these pictures of Hilary Duff arriving at LAX. This garbage has been a recurring theme with Hilary as of late. I need just a little more than a hint of booty for my Hilary Duff fix to keep me satisfied. Isn’t there an event she needs to attend or a photoshoot that requires her to reveal some skin? I’ll keep you posted.

Rihanna Bikini Pictures

2010-01-07T18:28:00.000-08:00

This time of year is great for us celebrity bloggers, all the hot celebrity chicks go on vacation and hang out in their bikinis. Here are some more shots of Rihanna hanging out on some rich dudes yacht showing off her hot body. I’d like to dip my marshmallow in that hot chocolate. Wait, marshmallows are short, chubby and soft… Forget I said that last part.

Gwen Stefani Bikini Pictures

2010-01-05T18:36:00.000-08:00

This is a first: Gwen Stefani in a bikini. Here she is vacationing with her family in St. Barths. You think she likes the color red? If it’s not painted on her lips it’s a bikini. Not that I’m complaining…. She looks hot. I just prefer to see more pink.

Rihanna Bikini Pictures

2010-01-05T18:33:00.000-08:00

Here’s Rihanna hanging out in her bikini in a Mexican hot-tub with her new boyfriend who, if you ask me, looks a lot like the old boyfriend. I think that makes me sound racist. Anyhow, the picture quality is so bad that if it wasn’t for the trademark rats nest hairdo we’d hardly even know this was Rihanna. I always though ‘Mexican Hot-tub’ was a euphemism for having sex with several midgets at once.

The Oddest Couple Ever?!

2010-01-04T18:47:00.000-08:00

It looks like boxing heavyweight champ Wladimir Klitschko has a thing for little people because here he is poolside in Miami with Hayden Panetierre. This the oddest couple ever! What is he 6’7 and she’s 5’ nothing? Please tell me they’re just friends because the thought of Hayden performing standing oral on someone other than me, is just too freaky of a fetish to visualize.

Lindsay Lohan Swimsuit Pictures

2010-01-04T18:41:00.000-08:00

If you ask me, there’s not much in this mixed up world more enjoyable than to watch a hot chick try on swimsuits in a sexy pair of heels. Here’s Lindsay Lohan and her delicious chesticles doing just that. I have to say that I’m impressed, if I were there I’d pay for the damn thing myself. After a came to of course, because chances are all my blood would have quickly rushed from my head causing m

The Most Disappointing Jessica Alba Beach Photos Ever!

2010-01-03T22:47:00.000-08:00

When I discovered that their were pictures of Jessica Alba on vacation on the beach in Mexico, I have to admit I got an excited feeling in my pants. Like I used to get climbing the rope in gym class. Sadly, these have to be some of the absolute worst Jessica Alba swimsuit pictures of all time. I bet if they made a bathing suit with a turtle neck she’d be wearing it.

Christina Aguilera Is Washed Up

2010-01-03T22:45:00.000-08:00

Here’s Christina Aguilera ringing in the New Year at Tao nightclub. We haven’t seen much Xtina, ever since she had kids, but this new look of hers isn’t working for me. Her funbags look deflated and the rest of her body looks like it belong to a 35 year old crack whore. I don’t even want to ask how much?

Pixie Lott Needs To Get Back To Being Cute

2009-12-30T01:35:00.000-08:00

This Pixie Lott chick needs to stop all the partying because she’s beginning to look a little worn out. She looks good in her little leather skirt, but she’s not the cute girl she once was and she’s only like eighteen years old. She’s supposed to wait until she’s at least thirty before she starts looking haggard and, between puff of her smokes, asking young dudes in a raspy voice if they like to party.

Christina Ricci Gets Banged Again

2009-12-30T01:32:00.000-08:00

Well it’s about time Christina Ricci got some bangs to cover that five head. I’m not sure if that is a wig or not, but it’s better than before. Anyway, other than that there’s not much going on in these pictures besides the booty profile in those skinny jeans. Sorry, I’m grasping at straws here…

Anna Kournikova Is A Hot Mess

2009-12-28T18:27:00.000-08:00

Here’s Anna Kournikova looking like a hot mess while out grocery shopping. Is she still dating that Spanish douche who covers his receding hairline with a hat all the time? I think she is because this is the type of clothing a girl in love wears. Fortunately, with years of experience I can undress her with my imagination. Try it, there’s an amazing body underneath all those layers…

Lindsay Lohan’s Sweet Profile

2009-12-28T18:25:00.000-08:00

I’ve always liked Lindsay Lohan, even when she was pretending to be a lesbian I thought she would make a hot f@#king third baseman, so I like these pictures of her trying on a little short skirt the other day. It’s impressive how such a skinny chick can have such nice meaty chesticles and a sweet booty profile. I’m proud of her.

Britney Spears Bikini Pictures

2009-12-27T19:48:00.000-08:00

Here’s Britney Spears in a bikini while vacationing in Mexico. Besides the hair and being crazy and all, her body looks pretty damn good. I guess extensive touring has done her well. Now if only I can get my girlfriend a record contract and booming sales, maybe I can get her on Britney’s fitness program. Unfortunately, she has no talent. I’m going to pay for that aren’t I?

Ashley Greene Bikini Photoshoot

2009-12-27T19:42:00.000-08:00

I don’t know if these pictures of Ashley Greene in her bikini are old or new, but they’re pretty damn hot so who really gives a shit. This isn’t the first time we’ve seen the ‘Twilight’ star in her bikini, but these are much sexier. It would have been nicer if her white tops had been see through, but you can’t win them all. Besides, I think I see a nipple in the black and white shot. You’re welcome.

Kate Hudson Is Winter Hot

2009-12-25T18:15:00.000-08:00

Here’s Kate Hudson and her mom out for a walk in Aspen the other day. Parts of her look pretty good, while others are covered in a silly fur coat. I thought celebrities had decided that fur was bad. I don’t give a sh%t either way, I’m just upset that she’s covering up her winter chesticles. That jacket could be made out of recycled Mediterranean women’s mustache hair for all I care, I’d still be pissed I can’t see her boobs.

Avril Lavigne At The Beach With A New Douche

2009-12-25T18:12:00.000-08:00

Apparently it didn’t take long for Avril Lavigne to move on to some other douche after her marriage to that dude from the boy band completely fell apart. Here she is walking romantically on the beach somewhere with new guy. I don’t really care that she’s already found someone else, I just wish she would have given us a few bikini pictures first. Disappointing.

Sienna Miller Bikini Pictures

2009-12-23T18:19:00.000-08:00

Here’s Sienna Miller in her bikini in Barbados the other day. Do I really need to say any more? Apparently she’s invited her ex Jude Law to go down and meet her for the holidays. Bad idea, getting back with your ex never works, especially when he barely has any hair left. The guy looks like he’s wearing Bruce WIllis’ toupee from Hudson Hawk. I’ve got more hair on my testes than that dude, why wasn’t I invited? Call me, I can be down there by the end of the day.

« Hollywood Tuna’s AmaTuna Moment – Sweet Booty Bikini Dance Cintia Dicker: Super Cute Redhead Model » Jessica Simpson Keeps Her ‘Gifts’ Under Wrap

2009-12-23T18:15:00.000-08:00

I was hoping that as we got deeper into the holiday season Jessica Simpson might consider unwrapping herself as a sort of early Xmas gift for me. It doesn’t look like it’s going to happen this year. Here she is still covering up the goods while out in New York City the other night. This is the celebrity blogging equivalent of getting a lump of coal in your stocking. It’s almost as bad the time I got that mail order bride… Some things just shouldn’t be bought an wrapped months in advance.

Cameron Diaz’s Side Boob In Marie Claire

2009-12-18T19:04:00.000-08:00

Having renewed my subscription to Marie Claire magazine, I find the articles fascinating, I noticed that Cameron Diaz decided to flash a little side-boob for me and I thought I would share it with the rest of the class. It’s not exactly the greatest side-boob but it will do in a pinch. When I was younger I always wanted to grow up to write about celebrity side-boobs. Mission accomplished.

Ashley Greene’s Cleavage Need Work

2009-12-18T19:01:00.000-08:00

Here’s Ashley Greene at the premiere of Sherlock Holmes last night showing off as much cleavage as she possible can. I’m not impressed. Shave my chest and put me in that dress and I think I’d have more impressive cleavage. But I’m not a big vampire star so nobody needs to see that sh&t. Anyhow, I’d still get jiggy with it, do people still say that? It’s cold in my mom’s basement and I don’t have cable. I think it still works.

Lindsay Lohan Has The Runs

2009-12-17T03:04:00.000-08:00

Times must be tough for Lindsay Lohan, here she is out last night in a pair of tattered leggings. Her legs look like they’ve been attacked by horny raccoons. Doesn’t she have her own line of leggings? If I find out she’s trying to sell this crap as a new style I’m going to be very disappointed. That’s like me having my own line of boxer shorts with holes in them and t-shirts with what I’m calling yoghurt stains on them.

More Lara Bingle Bikini Pictures

2009-12-17T03:02:00.000-08:00

In case yesterday’s Lara Bingle bikini pictures weren’t enough, here are some more of this Australian hottie. Still not sure if she had work done on her upper stomach/lower shoulders region so hopefully one of you fine readers can provide me with some topless pictures for my personal collection. Thanks in advance.

Catherine Zeta-Jones ‘Talents’ Are Impressive

2009-12-14T23:49:00.000-08:00

Here’s Catherine Zeta-Jones at some event somewhere, it doesn’t really matter, what matters is that she’s showing off an impressive pair of chesticles. I notice her crypt keeper husband is nowhere to be found, he must be off romancing his kidney stones in the bathroom somewhere. In any case, who knew Catherine was so “talented”? I thought she just did phone commercials.

Kate Beckinsale Was Made For Skinny Jeans

2009-12-14T23:47:00.000-08:00

I make fun of hipster skinny jeans quite a bit, but it may just be that I wasn’t seeing them on the right chicks. Most of the time they’re stretched to their limit on some chick who has no business wearing anything with the word skinny in the name, but these pictures of super MILF Kate Beckinsale really show me what these jeans are all about. Now if she could reminded me the true meaning of the words tube top we’d be in business.

Fergie’s Plumber Cleavage Dress

2009-12-13T19:01:00.000-08:00

Here’s Fergie at the premiere of Nine last night flashing some confusing cleavage in her little black dress. That half moon cut out section is throwing me off, It’s like watching a plumber fix the sink, I don’t know whether to look away or throw pencils at it. Anyhow, she looks alright for a Fergie, which isn’t saying much considering the verdict is still out on whether or not she’s got both male and female parts. In the mean time, enjoy.

Jessica Hart Wears Short Shorts

2009-12-13T18:59:00.000-08:00

In case you haven’t figured it out just by looking at these pictures, Jessica Hart is a model. A model with amazing long skinny legs and messed up teeth which for some reason I find very hot. I think that’s because chicks with imperfections will actually date me. My mother keeps telling me I need to lower my standards so I’m taking her advice. Jessica call me. Don’t worry, I’ll never make you wear braces, I can’t afford them.

Hilary Duff Needs To Wear More Clothing

2009-12-12T21:35:00.000-08:00

Hilary Duff continues her trend of wearing hot revealing little outfits, here she is in two t-shirts, a giant scarf and a jacket. My pants just got really loose all of a sudden. Can’t someone invite her to a premiere or some sort of event so that we can get a look at her in female clothing. She’s dressed like the guy who squeegees my windshield every morning. At least she’s wearing a tight pair of jeans and giving us a good look at her cute little ass. Squeegee guy always tells me to look on the bright side of things.

Pamela Anderson’s Boobs Come Out For Hugh

2009-12-12T21:31:00.000-08:00

Pamela Anderson and her big fake boobies came out last night in support of Hugh Hefner. I don’t know what she’s supporting him for, maybe living as long as he has, but I’m glad she brought her big golden globes along with her. What did Hugh Hefner do before Viagra? I’m guessing stretch it out with a couple of popsicle sticks and some duct tape. That’s what I do when I’m drunk.

Lindsay Lohan Exposed!

2009-12-08T05:35:00.000-08:00

These pictures from Muse Magazine, whatever that is, claim to be of Lindsay Lohan exposed. Unfortunately for us the only thing exposed is that dude’s bare ass in the second pic, which is completely uncalled for if you ask me. Luckily there are a couple of decent shots of Lindsay’s ass and cleavage, so it wasn’t a complete waste of my time. We all know what Lindsay’s junk looks like anyway so It’s nothing new.

Once Again, Jessica Simpson Disappoints

2009-12-08T05:32:00.000-08:00

I’m getting a little pissed off at Jessica Simpson lately. Every time we see her now she’s covered up like an old rich lady. We all know she gained a couple of inches around her waist, hips and course those delicious chesticles. So before she goes back to the gym and works off her insecurities, she needs to let me enjoy my favorite set in Hollywood while they’re at their biggest. Consider it an early Christmas present for me…

Mariah Carey’s Fat Cleavage For Unicef

2009-12-04T08:45:00.000-08:00

Here’s Mariah Carey at The 2009 Unicef Snowflake Ball. Knowing that Unicef is all about world hunger, I’m pretty sure Mariah and her fat boobies could feed a small 3rd world country. Not sure if silicon is toxic or not but if you’re starving I guess you’ve got to make do with what you get.

Jessica Simpson Disappoints

2009-12-04T08:42:00.000-08:00

How could anyone not be disappointed with the pictures of Jessica Simpson out in NYC last night? She looks absolutely huge. Maybe it’s the camera angle, maybe it’s the outfit she happens to be wearing or maybe it’s the massive amounts of corn dogs and cheese doodles she’s been eating at all the f@#king country fairs she sang at this summer. Her agent needs to book her some “gigs” at a few fat farms or Jenny Craig conventions because this is getting out of hand. The button on her jacket looks like it’s holding on for dear life. Hang in there little guy.

avril Lavigne Does Something Other Than Annoy Me

2009-12-03T06:55:00.000-08:00

It looks like Avril Lavigne is finally doing something other than being a washed up, divorced former teenage candy/punk rocker. Here she is filming some sort of commercial the other day. Good for her. Oh wait, it’s a Canadian commercial. Never mind. At least she didn’t go and do something stupid like ruin her body by having a baby. I just wish she’d grow out of this fake punk stage, she’s what thirty? Time to break out the slutty outfits, she’s a divorcee. Hot!

Heather Graham Because She Is Hot

2009-12-03T06:50:00.000-08:00

Here’s Heather Graham leaving MTV studios. I don’t know what she’s promoting other than pure cougar hotness. I’m not sure if Heather is old enough to be considered a cougar, but that’s the angle I’m going with for this post, otherwise I got nothing … Except for the tightness forming in my pants, but you don’t want to know about that.

Miranda Kerr Ruins A See Through Moment

2009-12-02T07:04:00.000-08:00

I always thought that supermodels were supposed to be free wheeling anything goes show your boobs at dinner parties kind of girls. Apparently I was wrong. Here’s Miranda Kerr covering up her chest plums on her way to something that none of us care about. Of all the people out there who I think would be comfortable not wearing a bra under a see through tank top, Miranda would be at the top of my list. Just ahead of Pamela Anderson and Perez Hilton.

Natalie Portman Needs To Cheer Up

2009-12-02T07:00:00.000-08:00

Here’s Natalie Portman at IFP’s 19th Annual Gotham Independent Film Awards last night. I don’t know what her problem is, but she doesn’t look all that happy to be there or it’s just a bad picture. Who knows? This looks like the mug shot of a woman who’s been caught doing embarrassing things in a public restroom. Cheer up princess.

Famke Janssen Is A First

2009-11-25T18:52:00.000-08:00

I think this could be my first post ever on Famke Janssen, which shouldn’t come as much of a surprise considering she’s a little older than most of the chicks featured on the site. However, I’m kinda in the mood for some cougar pictures so her we go…. I’ve got nothing. She’s not showing any skin, her nipples aren’t standing to attention and the whole thing is kinda boring. She’s just a nice looking lady out for an afternoon stroll. Hot right?

Ashley Greene’s Got Cleavage

2009-11-25T18:49:00.000-08:00

The new Twilight garbage has just come out and I’m already sick of all the annoying pale stars, except for Ashley Greene that is. Here she is at some Maxim party celebrating the December issue with her on the cover. The cover picture is pretty hot, but sadly these shots are kind of lame. I guess her boobs look alright, it’s a start.

Natalie Portman Cleans Up Well

2009-11-24T19:08:00.000-08:00

I don’t do many posts on Natalie Portman because she’s pretty damn boring and usually dresses like a bum. However, sometimes she can surprise us, like here at the ‘Brothers’ New York Premiere. Hopefully she will continue looking this good on a regular basis, but I doubt it. So enjoy it while you can, because chances are we won’t be seeing her here for another year.

Rihanna Gives Us A View

2009-11-24T19:05:00.000-08:00

Here’s Rihanna out the other day in a nice low cut top signing copies of…. Something or rather, it’s clearly not important, what’s important is that we’re getting a good look at her golden delicious candy apples. I’m not exactly sure if candy apples is a good euphemism for boobs, but I’m keeping it. Besides, when there are pictures of boobies on the site nobody reads this garbage anyway. Enjoy.

Jessica Simpson’s Cleavage Tease

2009-11-23T08:38:00.000-08:00

I have some good news: Jessica Simpson is finally revealing some cleavage again! Is this a sign of more good things to come from her? Let’s hope so because I was losing all hope in my favorite breasts in Hollywood. Anyway, she could still lose a couple of layers but I’m not complaining. There is enough of Jessica’s chesticles exposed here to satisfy me for a few hours.

Fergie Flashes The Goods For Victoria’s Secret

2009-11-23T08:35:00.000-08:00

I have to say that I’m pretty impressed that Fergie had the balls, neatly tucked into her undies I’m sure, to get up on stage in a little outfit and perform during the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show, knowing that some of the hottest women in the world are going to be walking around her in their tiny lingerie. As a woman it’s got to be pretty damn intimidating, how can you compete? Especially for someone like Fergie who let.s just say is in the autumn of her good looks.

Ashley Greene Is Red Hot

2009-11-18T07:32:00.000-08:00

I’m sure a lot of you teenagers, and some thirty-something housewives, are well aware that last night was the latest Twilight premiere and are all worked up hoping to see some shots of your favorite bi-curious man vampires. It’s not going to happen. I do however have some pictures of Ashley Greene looking red hot. I’m not into vampires, but I would like to suck her……. Actually I guess that has nothing to do with vampires.

Christina Aguilera Shows Off Her Stripper Heels

2009-11-18T07:29:00.000-08:00

Here’s Christina Aguilera looking pretty good strutting her stuff on the set of what I can only assume is some sort of shitty music video. I’m reluctant to say she’s hot because I see strippers who look like this every night and believe me I would not categorize them as hot. But because it’s Xtina I’m going to give her the benefit of the doubt just like I hope the strippers do for me when I reassure them that it really is penis and not just a massive clitoris. Strippers can be cruel when you don’t tip them appropriately.

Jayde Nicole’s Is Freaking Me Out

2009-11-17T08:26:00.000-08:00

Here’s Playboy Playmate Jayde Nicole hosting some event the other night in her sweet 1980’s hooker outfit. For a young broad she sure looks like she’s had some work done on that face. Botox? Eye-lift? Something. Whatever it is it’s freaking me out, she’s beginning to look like a fifty year old woman trying to recapture her youth after her husband left her for a younger model. That being said, I wouldn’t kick her out of bed for eating crackers… Especially because crackers is a prostitute I know. Ha!

Megan Fox Is A Sexy Nerd

2009-11-17T08:22:00.000-08:00

Here’s Megan Fox dressed as some sort of sexy emo nerd getting herself a coffee the other day. Someone needs to tell her that Halloween is over and she can get back to dressing like the hot piece of tail that she is. Although seeing her like this makes me feel like I’ve actually got a chance to “Get With Her” as the kids say. Who am I kidding? If Brian Austin Douche can bang her so can pretty much anyone with a steady paycheck. Good luck everyone.

Mariah Carey Is Busting Out Of Her Dress

2009-11-11T06:58:00.000-08:00

appeared on Letterman the other night and once again she stuffed her fat boobies into a skin tight dress. I know many of you guys love Mariah with all this extra junk, and to be honest when we get pictures of mostly her upper half, I do too. She looks very comfortable. I want to use her as a pillow and a cup holder.

Audrina Patridge Works It

2009-11-11T06:54:00.000-08:00

I’m guessing these are pictures of Hollywood nobody Audrina Patridge on her way to the gym because she’s not exactly looking like someone who’s just had a vigorous workout. Although, she’s a pseudo celebrity so I doubt any of her workouts are very vigorous, it probably involves some ass clenches and some Stuart Smalley self affirmation. “I’m good enough, I’m smart enough, and doggone it, people like me!”. People do like her fake boobs so close enough.

Kristin Cavallari Is Wet

2009-11-10T06:45:00.000-08:00

Here’s Kristin Cavallari leaving the salon while her hair is still wet. Obviously I only posted these pictures because I had what I thought was a clever tittle, but in fact it only turned out to be a lame joke about lady boners. Ugh, this is a new low, all those years at celebrity blogger university are completely going to waste.

Jennifer Love Hewitt’s Still Trying To Prove She Is Not Fat

2009-11-10T06:40:00.000-08:00

I guess Jennifer Love Hewitt will do just about anything to win back her male fans and be considered a sex symbol again. Here she is in a stripping scene for the Ghost Whisperer. I don’t watch the show, but I bet Jen strategically requested that they add that in. Anyway, I’ve been to many strip clubs and once you get the girls out of the black light, it’s a whole different story. Trust me! So Jen can try all she wants to win my heart back, but I’m not fooled. Until she takes it all off and proves me otherwise, she’ll always be a fattie in my books.

kristin Cavallari’s Lace Top Reveals Too Much

2009-11-08T18:41:00.000-08:00

was spotted making the rounds at the Breeder’s Cup Winners Circle event at the ESPN Zone last night in a top that can only be described as revealing. Not revealing like ‘I was breast fed until I was twelve’ revealing, more like ‘I can see your boobies’ revealing. Which is much better if you ask me, although the first one may explain my obsession with boobs. I think we’ve had a breakthrough, that’s all the time we’ve for this week.

lindsay Lohan’s Boobs Need More Exposure

2009-11-08T18:36:00.000-08:00

I got these pictures of Lindsay Lohan on her way to, you guessed it, some party but I’m not all that impressed with them. She looks alright, other than the retarded vest she’s wearing, but I’m not seeing enough skin. Winter sucks! Hopefully the global warming Al Gore has been promoting will kick in soon so we can get these hotties in some skimpier outfits. Although, any shirt that frames the boob as nicely as this one is alright by me. Enjoy.

Mariah Carey Is So Fat She Can Barely Walk

2009-11-03T08:27:00.000-08:00

Mariah was on Leno last night and she almost fell flat on her fat ass. I guess she’s not used to supporting all that extra weight, especially the upper front load… so I can understand the equilibrium problem. Anyway, I’m not complaining, but I think that dress she is wearing is a few sizes too small and it can barely contain all that junk. It’s time for her to go shopping!

Lindsay Lohan’s Lips Blow

2009-08-31T19:13:00.000-07:00

I’ve become obsessed with Lindsay Lohan’s new lips. It boggles mind that she would inject fat into them, when the rest of her body needs it more. Regardless of how unhealthy Lindsay looks, I still think her and her new lips to be sexy in a sick-o kinda way. Just imagine the friction those things could provide… Unfortunately, that’s all we can do is think since she still a fake lesbo… Good enough.

Megan Fox Is A Naughty Cheerleader

2009-08-31T19:08:00.000-07:00

I thought I was just drunk last night when I saw that shooting star with the giant dog from the ‘Never Ending Story’ chasing it but now I know that it had to be real because my wish came true this morning. I’m sure I can’t be the only one who wished for pictures of Megan Fox dressed as a hot little cheerleader but I’m going to claim responsibility for this one. The picture of her heating up her tongue with a lighter isn’t bad either, nothing like a warm hummer to start off the day.

mena suvari: the new paris hilton

2009-08-25T19:24:00.001-07:00

Here’s Mena Suvari showing off her strong legs while hosting a vodka party called ‘Absolut Saturday’ at AZURE over the weekend. It’s kind of sad that she went from young movie star with loads of potential to doing Paris Hilton type shit like this. Alright so maybe it’s not that sad, at least it’s a job, and the wind almost blew her dress up so it’s a win win situation. I know she’s in a bikini under there, might as well drop out of that thing and show us that phat ass. That’s right, p-h-a-t.

more pictures of Mena Suvari here

jennifer aniston gives us a view

2009-08-25T19:16:00.000-07:00

Here’s Jennifer Aniston on the set of her new movie ‘The Bounty’ getting arrested by that Cro-Magnon actor who’s name I can’t remember. Seriously, I bet he lives in a nice cave in the Hollywood hills with nice fur rugs and the latest in cave paintings. I’m sure the movie is going to be just as awful as all her other films but at least we’re getting a nice view down her top at some decent cleavage. Besides, Jennifer Aniston in handcuffs has been on top of my fantasy list for over a decade.

28 more pictures of Jennifer Aniston here

ashlee Simpson’s Got Cleavage

2009-08-24T18:48:00.000-07:00

Here’s Ashlee Simpson at ‘the Melrose Place’ launch party the other night. She’s no Jessica but I have to say that her tits are looking pretty damn good, her sister must be rubbing off on her. Jesus there’s a sweet visual burned into my mind. I’m sure there’s a Saudi prince out there who would pay a shitload of money to see that. At least Ashlee would be working.

katy Perry’s Breasts Are About To Spill

2009-08-24T18:45:00.000-07:00

These are some pictures of Kate Perry at the ‘V Festival 2009′ at Weston Park the other day. I don’t know what this festival is but if I had to guess I would say that V stands for vagina. Whatever it is her sweet hipster tits look like they’re about to fall out of her stupid outfit. She must have gotten a little too excited because her pink thing is starting to show. Get it? Not many people can appreciate a good dog boner joke.

Heidi Montag To “Perform’ At The Miss Universe Beauty Pageant

2009-08-20T19:09:00.000-07:00

Donald Trump must be absolutely desperate because he’s hired Heidi Montag, of all people, to “perform’ at the Miss Universe Beauty Pageant this weekend. I guess if you like retards lip-singing then tune in. I’m disappointed in the Donald, if you’re going to hire Heidi for a performance you should make sure that it’s a small affair, maybe half a dozen friends of yours in a classy motel room with water pistols filled with baby oil not all over network television. You would think he’s learned his lesson by now.